(“It’s All Just a Monotonous Downhill Slope From Here”) — Act I Rachel Marsh’s 30s begins at her surprise birthday party. There are lots of balloons and a giant sign that says “Happy Second 29th Birthday!” The partygoers are all having a good time laughing and dancing together. Rachel, however, is seen off to the side, lamenting to a handful of friends…

Always wondered which iconic reindeer YOU most resemble? Find out here! — We all grew up around the holidays reading books and singing songs about Santa and his team of reindeer who helped deliver presents across the world. But have you ever wondered which of Santa’s reindeer your personality is most similar to? Take this quiz (for best results, be honest!) …

8 if you count those claymation Christmas movies — Christmas is said to be the most wonderful time of the year, and — I’m going to be honest here — I think it’s because it’s hogging all the best things for itself. I understand that some traditions need to be occasional in order to maintain their novelty. And there…

Watch out, this “man’s world” is being taken over by boss ladies! — So, you landed the #dreamjob and are “living your best life!” in the professional world. Congrats! But now that you want to work on climbing that corporate ladder, you may be afraid that you’ll have to straighten up and get rid of all the stuff that shows off your totally…

The best part about “National Bathtub Day” is that it doesn’t require any tacky fucking sweaters — In case you hadn’t noticed from those pop-up Christmas tree lots on the side of the highway or that unexplainable joy in the pit of your stomach — the holiday season is upon us! This is often a time of coziness and cheer felt across the world. However, for many…

“We Seafood and Eat It” indeed! — Boxed Mac & Cheese Mixed with Still Kind of Frozen Boca Burgers and a Bunch of Ketchup Answer: this was a recipe I made when I was stoned! But if it WAS an OPI nail polish color, the color would be between something like “sunset” and “the dog just threw up.” Actually Now That I Look at It, That Avocado Doesn’t Look That Bad, I Don’t Know Why I Threw It Away, I Can Still Probably Make Guacamole

Question #1: The what? — “Officials in Ohio are investigating allegations that the two anglers participating in the Lake Erie Walleye Trail Fishing Tournament cheated by adding weights to their fish.” — The Washington Post Question: Is this where I’m supposed to ask what the Lake Erie Walleye Trail Fishing Tournament is? Answer: Seems like…

Fantasy football draft spice, anyone? — The fall season is upon us, bringing with it pumpkin spice and its takeover of the most innocent of victims: pastries, candy, beer, deodorant, Build-a-Bears, and even tampons according to this one meme. While many people are thrilled about the sudden pumpkin takeover, it’s become a hugely divisive issue in…

The downside of living in Chicago is the cold winters, the crime, the pizza that’s way too thick, people smoking on the train sometimes, and the critical decision every resident has to make about which baseball team to follow. Being from Richmond, I’ve never had to choose sides on something…